It can be hard for some to understand why a survivor of spousal rape would stay in the relationship or situation. Each survivor of spousal rape may be mentally affected differently than others. Some survivors may not be financially well enough to leave their current situation. No matter what the situation is, it is important for anyone who may be suffering from spousal rape to be educated on their options.

Important Terms to Know

When talking about rape, a few terms may appear more than once. It's important to be educated on what those terms mean.

• Rape. Rape is considered a sexual act where one or more parties did not consent or the perpetrator used force or coercion to carry out the act. Rape can also occur when a person is unable to provide consent (e.g. intoxicated, sleeping, etc).
• Consent. Consent is when all parties of a sexual act actively agree to participate.
• Coercion. Coercion can occur when a perpetrator uses their power over someone to make them feel threatened into following through with the sexual activity or making them feel like they owe the perpetrator sexual intercourse.
• Force. Force can occur when the perpetrator physically compels someone into having sexual intercourse or uses drugs or alcohol to impair them.

Spousal Rape in Oklahoma

In 1993, all states moved to recognize that a spouse or partner does not have ownership over the other partner's body. Though the laws may slightly vary by state, both partners need to consent to sexual activity before it takes place. Oklahoma is one of the states that may punish a spousal rape charge the same way any other rape charge may be punished.

Four Options for Survivors of Spousal Rape

Just like any other survivor of rape, a survivor of spousal rape has multiple options. It is important to know these options even if you've never been a victim of rape. They could be helpful to you or a loved

one in the future.

1. Report the Assault to the Authorities

This may seem like an obvious option to some. However, this can be a more difficult option for those who have fallen victim to their own spouse or intimate partner. Spousal rape can be more difficult to prove than any other rape because you are most likely sexually intimate with your partner, but that does not negate from the crime at hand. Spouse or not, all perpetrators deserve to be held accountable for their actions.

2. Leave or File for Divorce

This option can be difficult depending on the hold the spouse has on the survivor. There can be other forms of abuse in the relationship, including financial abuse, that make it difficult for the survivor to financially be able to leave on their own. If you are able to find a safe place to stay (with a trusted family member or friend, at a shelter, etc) this is a good option. Many shelters even offer assistance programs.

3. Find Resources on the Internet

If you can safely search on the internet for programs or resources in your area to leave your current situation, you should do so as soon as possible. There are hotlines on the internet, such as hotline.org, that you can reach out to that can help you create a safety plan. You can speak to someone who has been in your shoes or who is educated on the proper steps to take and will help you create a plan personalized for your situation.

4. File a Restraining Order

This can be a very important step that many may not deem necessary until it's too late. If you have sufficient grounds for a judge to grant you a restraining order, do not take a chance - get the restraining order. This can provide you with a little extra safety as well as peace of mind.



If you've experienced spousal rape and need legal assistance, contact us at The Kanehl Law Firm P.L.L.C. to schedule your free consultation.